The One Who Got Away

“Only you can calm my soul.” -August Rush

There. I’m having a moment. Talked to a colleague this afternoon through e-mail and I suddenly felt, I miss this person. We usually talk a lot of stuff; he became my buddy for a long time and now, it come to this. I don’t know what to talk about. I want to have more conversation with him and I just went…blank. Even I know I can just drop by to his post, but some things do change. Then I remember all the people I used to talk to, hanged with. Then I suddenly miss everyone. I miss all of them. I know this is normal. Feeling a certain part of you is not being fed, a piece of friendship for that person.
Well, things changed. These people changed. I understand and I don’t exempt myself to that. You want to get in touch but that’s the only thing you could do. E-mail, text, call, and I don’t think it’s enough. When I miss a person, I want to get in touch and do the usual things we do. Real laugh, current stories you both know, like you just give each other a look and you know what the other one is thinking. But those are hard to do again, with someone you haven’t got in touch with for a period of time. Different priorities, distance, that what makes it difficult.

Gelo resigned, Mel resigned, Joel and May transferred, Gemma and Julius became so distant, Mommy Les just turned to gone, friends back in the province, well actually, they don’t qualify here. I miss them, I do, but they’re the people who need no adjustment. We are who we are when we meet, no matter how long, like we’re altogether every day. But the names I mentioned, they are the people who need more nourishment in me and they are all missing.

When people go, may it be miles or just a post away, their priorities and routines changes too. Changes that you no longer take part. And that’s where my emotions coming from! I’m sad. Knowing there will be no ME in their life. They may always remember me, as I do for them, but I want to be with them, in current, and them to me. I am so selfish for thinking that, eh that’s what I feel eh…
Just saying…

Bygones.

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